I soon got a bit bored with ex-girlfriend’s duplicitous charade and suddenly said it didn’t matter if she had sent me a text meant for her ex-boyfriend. That was when she went mental. I suppose it might have been a bit insensitive of me seeing as how much energy she had just expended creating her cock and bull story but even so. After explaining the meaning of every sentence in the text again – by now she was beginning to sound like Carl Jung wrapping up his views on the significance of the king, the queen and the two doves in medieval alchemical etchings - she told me it was the first time she had found my behaviour unattractive, that I was being absurd and that if this was what I was going to be like it might be better if we split up now. She still won’t admit that text was to him, she still gets angry when I bring it up. Women are the same when they betray you. Again something vicious emerges. They might look a bit sheepish at first but that doesn’t last long. Pretty soon it’s your fault. Pretty soon they’ve worked themselves up into a righteous scorn for the eternal inadequacy of your feeling. We can never quite get it right where feeling is concerned. It’s always slightly underdone or a bit on the burnt side. Women like to complain that men have always tried to tell them how to look. So why don’t men complain that women have always tried to tell us what we should feel? It seems to me most men just throw in the towel at a certain point. They can’t be bothered anymore. Disagreeing with a woman on a point of feeling is more exhausting than anything gyms have so far been able to come up with. One assumes the married man learns what’s expected of him, like a schoolboy, and generally comes up with the correct answer. Aren’t those tea cups the prettiest things you’ve ever seen, dear? Is that a trick question? It could be of course. She might just be testing you to see how well she has you trained.
Oh yeah, I laughed. But I don't think it's only women; the "You drove me to it" excuse is universal. And pretty lame.
ReplyDeleteThe trick is to not listen to the words that are issuing forth from their mouths; there is a very low correlation between what they say and what they are trying to communicate. No, to understand what a woman is saying you have to study them determinedly like the distant planets they are. You won’t get far but they will appreciate the effort.
ReplyDeleteAs for catching them up in a lie, it’s a no-win situation. If you corner them you lose–and it can get violent. I had a woman try to strangle me once–and if you don’t say anything you end up despising them for being dishonest. I have a neat trick; I allow them three or four lies. I can handle that; after all they’re not angels and neither am I. However if they go over three it’s time to seriously evaluate. If there is one I won’t tolerate it’s duplicity. In a friend it’s ugly, in a lover/wife it’s like living with a werewolf; you never know when they’re going to turn on you.